Our second and third baby

Hi guys,

There is something I’ve been meaning to tell you.

In January, Tom and I found out we are expecting another baby.

In February we found out we are expecting twins.

In March we found out our babies had several abnormalities and were deemed incompatible with life. Specifically, both of our twins have limb body wall complex.

Now it’s May and I am 21 weeks pregnant with these sweet babies.

twin pregnancy limb body wall

At 12 weeks our ultrasound technician left the room quietly to get our doctor. I told Tom she looked upset. We already knew we were having twins, we already knew there was a chance they could be conjoined.

My OB sent us to a maternal fetal medicine doctor the same day. The doctor came in and the quietest voice, told us that our babies were incompatible with life. She listed off several abnormalities and showed us each one.

She explained that none of it added up to be any one defect or any one cause. She said they could also be conjoined at the liver, we just don’t know.

She asked if I had any questions. I looked at the screen, where I just saw two hearts beating and asked: “but they are still alive…so why are they still alive”?

She quietly said, “I don’t know”.

She got up to leave and told us to take as much time as we needed which sounded ridiculous.

Then, I looked at Tom and sobbed like I have never sobbed before. Good thing Tom was there to hold me because it was 20 minutes before I could walk again. As we cried, we both cried out to Jesus. The presence of the Holy Spirit became so thick in the room we could tangibly feel God all around us. We both walked out with a peace we still can’t explain. Except we can.

God goes before us, He is always with us, He never forsakes us. God was already there.

And the same God who I walked into that exam room with, is the same God I left with.

His promises are real. And even in this I have joy.

God is bigger than all of my fear.

Our faith tells us God can heal these babies completely. And we know they are already whole and complete in Jesus. No matter how long we have them, we are their parents- stewards of their souls. If we lose them, we know that Jesus conquered death. So we have no fear. We only have joy.

I plan to post about our journey. Even the hard parts. Already, I have gained so much from reading from other parents who faced a similar diagnosis. Already God has shown up for us in ways we can’t explain but will try to witness too.

Will you pray our sweet babies and for us- believe with us for a miracle and trust God to do a work in us either way? We so covet your prayers. Thank you sweet friends.

Cherishing all of your prayers and forever thankful for these babies,

-Emily

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10 Comments

  1. Ashleigh
    May 24, 2018 / 1:53 am

    Praying for you and those sweet babies!

  2. Kristina
    May 29, 2018 / 3:28 am

    Praying for your family and those precious babies! All things are possible through Christ our Lord!

  3. Jill williams
    May 30, 2018 / 12:32 pm

    I would love to.folow your blog

  4. Helen williams
    June 1, 2018 / 11:53 am

    Praying for your precious babies

  5. June 3, 2018 / 4:17 pm

    prayer, for the babies. My daughter first pregnancy was with twins. They told her Bryson had stage 2 brain bleed. Adalyn was ok. She made it to 24weeks and the babies come. She had them in a small hospital and they were flown to a bigger hospital. There they made it one day. Adalyn gave up the fight and Bryson went to a stage 4 brain bleed. They disconnected Bryson. Both BAbies died in their mothers arms. We have no regrets that we got to meet these little ones before God took them home. As a grandmother i fell in love with them the moment i seen them, as did their mom and dad and the others that were there. We have a great pastor who went though all of this with us. Well as of today, my daughter has a health little two yr old boy and she is expecting a little girl in 5 weeks. The children’s birthdays will be one week apart. I see loosing the twins was heart breaking, but in a way, as i look at it, God has giving my daughter her babies back, but in a way i feel he knew she could handle it. Bryson would of had some problems and with two, she most likely would of been overwhelmed. God took a situation that was heartbreaking and made another joyful. God is good and he only gives us what we can handle. God is Good God bless and prayers with you and the babies.

  6. Belinda
    June 3, 2018 / 8:37 pm

    Praying for strength and peace.

  7. Sherry Mullis
    June 4, 2018 / 2:35 am

    Praying for you and these precious twins.

  8. Beth Jones
    June 7, 2018 / 4:29 pm

    …keeping you, babies and family in prayer…also Doctors/staff…Heavenly Father, Into your hands we
    place these precious babies. We place the worries, cares and troubles that is felt on this journey. Into
    your wisdom, we place the babies path, direction and goals for life. Psalm 118:24

  9. Beth Jones
    June 7, 2018 / 4:35 pm

    Lifting the babies in prayer…along with family, doctors/staff. Heavenly Father, Into your hands we place these babies. We place the worries, cares and troubles on this journey. We place their path, direction and their life goals, You have for them. Psalm 118:24

  10. Linda
    June 9, 2018 / 6:10 pm

    May God Bless you all. Every baby is a gift for however long we may have them. Sometimes we are only blessed to have them while we carry them inside for a few weeks or months, sometimes we get to meet them for a few precious moments, sometimes we get to watch them grow. But we always carry them in our hearts, knowing we will be reunited in God’s time. Our God is a loving God and he showers his love on you and your little family! It is amazing how many lives those two little angels are touching with their story! Prayers for each step of your journey!

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